"Whatever you want it to be"

This is where I started the purposeful life. The power of this statement lies in the kind of person we currently are. And more and more I see examples of man and women who live by this, whether or not they realize it. We have the power to choose. It is a right, and never should be a privilege. We choose to be what we want. The helplessness set in when we give in, when we resign to the so called "facts of life", that we are powerless, or are limited in what we can do.

This is the essence:

Examine the person you are, be the person you are, and if you want to change, make sure it's for the right reasons. Along the journey, you will realize the things that are important to you. Not urgent. Important. This is the way to become who you want to be, not out of thrill, or momentary inspiration. It must be something that can sustain you, that can push you one more step when you feel like giving up. First step is always the longest stride. Decide what you want, for you alone will be living with the consequences. Sure, there's always free rides, what's worth the prize, is always, always worth the fight.

The purpose of life.

I'm sure many of us ponder sometimes on this question, and I'm also sure a lot just leave the question after not finding a satisfactory answer. We revisit it once in a while, and unless we find the answer, there's always this nag that keeps chewing at our heart.

Some of us are lucky to have found the answer, however unacceptable to others, which makes us feel the world makes sense again. It's usually in these "a-ha!" moments that we experience life changing emotions, making the decisions and move on with a renewed outlook. We become a new person.

I would like to share mine, having found "my" answer sometime ago, and while I don't expect this to make sense to all, at least put it in your life's context and see if it fits. I've been searching, asking, pestering, many people, knowledgeable people, people who I respect for their answers. And none of it made sense to me.

The persons we are.

Progress of mankind as we know has come with a hefty price tag, whether we realize or not. We take pride in creating something out of nothing, the skyscrapers, bridges, even themed parks. We take refuge in the comfort of what these things bring, that we are better than our parents. We are always more knowledgeable than the previous generations, and wiser than the next, aren't we?

We feast on new things which interest us, something that no one has ever seen. This is the reason why I think we have all the animosities all around. We are so deep in stretching out that we forgot the very outreached arms are actually attached to ourselves. We forgot to take care of the body, the mind, the spirit, of us.

But all is not lost, in all histories, we can always see spots of bright blobs everyday. The tales of simple human beings overcoming the odds, of us knowing, understanding and realizing what really matter. And aren't these tales which actually touch us in the deepest of our hearts? Which makes us want to be better?

We strive to be better, to visualize where we want to be, and we forgot to be just where we are. It's always "what's next", always "just one more", always want to be someone, have to be someone. We believe in contentment stifling progress. If only we see progress as an improved oneself.

Too..

I was on my way to work yesterday morning and was stuck in a slow moving river of vehicles. The reason became apparent soon as I passed the scene of accident; a motorcycle was by the roadside, and suddenly I saw the motorcyclist (or rider) covered in black plastic bag.

My heart sank, right there. I felt so weak, powerless. Emotions took over and I couldn't function for the day. I keep thinking about the deceased, how he would have never thought that it will be his last day here, how his family would be so devastated to get the news.

Before I could pick myself up, I saw this:

Brothers in desperate bid to save mother
http://www.thestandard.com.hk/breaking_news_detail.asp?id=13866&icid=2&d_str=20090422

I just couldn't take it. Too much adversities, too little love. Too much to do, too little time...

Snippets...

1. I don't know how politicians, or anyone who are not truthful, can look at their children straight.

2. There has got to be a better way for umbrella users to get into their car in downpour.

3. Dogs are the best healers. Innocence breeds honesty.

arrgghh..mental block...tbc

Someday I'll Be Saturday Night...

Sometimes when we get weary of the world around us, we will at one time or another be tempted to give up, give in, or just give away. And more often than not, the temptations have the upper hand. We ask "why me?", but somehow we are still here today. We are here, thus we are winners, we stick around. We get battered every day and yet we are left standing. But sometimes, we just need a break...

Anyway, this is one of my favorite bands, if only they are performing here again, bet your ass I'm gonna be there...

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Hey man, I'm alive
I'm takin' each day and night at a time
I'm feelin' like a Monday but someday I'll be Saturday night

Hey my name is Jim, where did I go wrong
My life's a bargain basement, all the good shit's gone
I just can't hold a job, where do I belong
Been sleeping in my car, my dreams move on
My name is Billy Jean, my love was bought and sold
I'm only sixteen I feel a hundred years old
My foster daddy went, took my innocence away
The street life ain't much better but at least I'm getting paid

And Tuesday just might go my way
It can't get worse than yesterday
Thursdays Fridays ain't been kind
But somehow I'll survive

Hey man, I'm alive
I'm taking each day and night at a time
Yeah I'm down, but I know I'll get back
Hey, hey, hey, hey, man I gotta live my life
Like I ain't got nothing but this roll of the dice
I'm feeling like a Monday but someday I'll be Saturday Night

Now I can't say my name or tell you where I am
I want to blow myself away, don't know if I can
I wish that I could be in some other time and place
With someone else's soul, someone else's face

Oh, Tuesday just might go my way
It can't get worse than yesterday
Thursdays, Fridays ain't been kind
But somehow I'll survive

Hey, man I'm alive
I'm taking each day and night at a time
Yeah I'm down, but I know I'll get back
Hey, hey, hey, hey, man I gotta live my life
I'm gonna pick up all the pieces and what's left of my pride
I'm feeling like a Monday but someday I'll be Saturday night

Saturday night
Here we go

Someday I'll be Saturday night
I'll be back on my feet, I'll be doing all right
It may not be tomorrow baby, that's ok
I ain't going down, gonna find a way

Hey, hey, hey
Man I'm alive I'm taking each day and night at a time
Yeah I'm down, but I know I'll get back
Hey, hey, hey, hey man I'm gonna live my life
Like I ain't got nothing but this roll of the dice
I'm feeling like a Monday but someday I'll be Saturday night

I'm feeling like a Monday but someday I'll be Saturday night
Saturday night ... all right
All right ... all right
Saturday night

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Tupperware--continued

...so, what do we do? We were so certain if we take care of the different tupperwares we would be taken care of. Of course there are some who just go with it and pray that they are taken care of.

we have to throw away the notion that life is something that we can easily perceive; the same goes with the notion that it is impossible to understand. We can't have the ostrich mentality and think that by focusing on what we think is right, it is right. Doing the right things and doing things right are two completely different, albeit not mutually exclusive, actions.

My point is, we must look at things holistically (I've been holding myself so hard to not using this word, but alas!). I say "must" and not "should" because that is the only way we can feel complete. Have you ever had the feeling that you're happy in some areas of your life but not in others, and then scrambling to address those inadequacies? That's like patching a wet, leaking clay bowl while thinking it will dry in time for you to enjoy life.

If you've not tried it, give meditation a chance. Don't get anti-climaxed by the simple solution, and don't think the value is diluted by the mass following. It's non glamorous, but simple things are usually just that, simple and unglamorous.

Tupperware

I am a pretty religious person, or at least i'd like to think that I am. Not because I staunchly observe the rites and rituals of it, but because religion as I know is something which we can't separate from "the others". Bear with me, I'm coming to the point soon...

We focus a lot in making our lives easy, or easier; and to do this, we tupperware everything. We have the physical tupperware, the emotional, mental, spiritual etc.

And once we think we have everything covered, we then zoom in into each of the tupperware, and look for ways to better ourselves in the said area. Most obvious examples, we improve physically by exercising and eating right, emotionally by attending self help courses, reading motivational books etc, spiritually by having faith, praying, and performing the respective requisites. Very close to the point now...

When we consciously think of ways to improve in these areas, we will slowly tend to do for the sake of doing, to just want to check off the things we've done, so that we will see ourselves as having accomplised something, and feel good about it.

But this does not prepare ourselves one bit to the things that matters. We think they do, after all we ARE tending to the things that are important to us. Remember that the things that should scare us is not what's in front of us. These we can actually handle rather simply (another topic for another time). It's the thing that hit us out of nowhere, that just make our knees weak, hearts pumping, adrenaline rushing. These, not many are prepared.

to be continued...

Equality between men and women

This is actually a rather stupid an argument topic, just like saying we should save the whale because it will be extinct and the next generations will lose a treasure.

There can never be equality. Having equality will in the end tilt the favor to the women, which negates the whole intent of having this equality at the first place. "How?", you asked. Think about it, if women can do whatever men are doing, especially "traditionally men's tasks", like careers of choice, ways of communicating, status in a family, in society etc., and at the same time expecting men to be gentlemen and open doors, hold handbags, pamper etc., aren't all these pointing to the disadvantaged men?

To the women out there, you can convince me of either being equal in the way you behave yourselves, OR the way you are being "behaved", ie treated, but never both. I subscribe to the equality of opportunities availed to both sexes, but treatment? That I will fight with any eves out there, anytime.